It’s My Blog — I’ll Self-Aggrandize If I Want To: Revolutionary Blogging Haiku Lament

Almost all I post/
on my blog can be thought self-/
aggrandizement. Und?

Pain’s Not Purposeful: Revolutionary ImproVerse Haiku

When folks hurt others, /
it’s not because they mean to./
It’s they just don’t care.*
or
*They’re just not caring.

Christmas Perspective Changed: Revolutionary Email Free Verse Poem

T’was a few nights before Christmas
and I was feeling
sorry for myself,
seeing all my friends
and relations
surrounded by kids
and grandkids,
hugging each other,
decorating the houses,
trimming the trees,
making Christmas cookies,
fudge,
candy,
and other
wonderful
treats,
filling their homes
with the joyful laughter,
singing,
and sweet smells
of the season.

Then I remembered
what I had,
and who,
and arose out of my pity bed,
sprang to the kitchen,
pre-heated the oven
and made cookies
and my traditional
sweet-smelling apple crisp
for my mother.

Start Now To Serve: Revolutionary ConTEXTing Haiku

I have been selfish/
and lazy, but I can start/
now to better serve.

I Am No Longer Unclean (I Hope) — Revolutionary ConTEXTing Free Verse Poem

Those who I worked with,
Prayed with,
Laughed with,
Helped,
Was helped by,
Taught,
Was taught by,
Mourned with,
Loved
And was, I thought,
Loved by;
Those who I Disappointed
And walked away from,
Now treat me,
As I return,
Like a leper.
As though my filth
Is still there.
As though
I will somehow
Taint and soul soil them/
With my past,
Instead of lift them
With my future,
With the possibility
Brought about by the Reason
We’ve worshipped together before.

I am surprised
To have to say,
Again,
I’m sorry.

I’m shocked
That after decades
Of talking in councils
And classes,
Around campfires
And sports fields,
And sitting down at BBQ
And Thai and other meat,
That we can’t
Now meet;
That when they see me,
They have nothing to say
To me.
That their lives,
And their children,
No longer matter
To me
Who spent
thousands of hours
On.

Perhaps I
And mine
Never mattered
To them.

Should they leap
To embrace me
And welcome me
And my return?
Is that selfish?
Do I expect
Too much?
Why not?
I would.

But maybe it’s true:
You can’t return
No matter how cleansed
You’ve become.

Should She Know We Hurt? Revolutionary ImproVerse Haiku Lament

Is it selfish to/
tell her how much we hurt? Or/
is it honesty?

Caroling To A Dying Woman: Revolutionary ConTEXTing Haiku

Caroling for a/
small crowd, I felt bad ’til I/
heard: This is her last.

Turn Out: Revolutionary ConTEXTing Haiku

For years I’ve tried to fix
me. I’ve forgotten to help
others. I must change.

Pained And Missing You: Romantic ImproVerse Haiku Lament

Is it selfish to/
say how much I miss being/
with you when I’m pained?

How We Served Memories: Revolutionary ImproVerse Free Verse Poem

Of course she remembers
me never serving.
Of course she recalls
I left quickly from every activity,
from every meeting,
from every event.
Of course she recollects
I said “Let’s just go home.”

And of course my children remember
completely the opposite.
They recall that we stayed,
and cleaned up,
and helped put things away,
and talked to everyone,
and were frequently
among the last to leave.

Because when she,
hurt,
in pain,
complaining,
was with us,
my sole desire,
knowing of her pain
and her discomfort,
was to get her home
as quickly as possible;
to get her relaxed
and rested;
to serve her
the best way I knew how.

But when she wasn’t with us,
then my desire was to stay
with my children and
my friends and neighbors,
and serve,
and teach my children to serve.

So both my children’s memories
and her recollections
of how we served,
or didn’t,
are correct.

I do not have to justify
my actions
as I raised my children.
I feel vindicated,
justified,
and absolved.

I did the best
I knew how.
I know it.
My children know it.
And I know He knows it,
because He just told me.